The saying, and the idea, have been around forever. We cannot do this motherhood thing alone. And I feel so lucky to have the friends and family around me that I do.

This group of ladies has grown together and gone through every phase of life side by side, which makes it extra special. While I have made great friends through college and work, I’ve always found my way back to these girls. Some of them I have known since sixth grade… the rest since ninth grade.. so like, we were babies still! And now look at all the babies we have made!

As you can see, we all grew our families fairly quickly and right around the same time. There are 20 children between the 11 of us, with a couple more on the way. We have gone through everything from young love, heartbreaks, college, more heartbreak, surprise pregnancies, meeting our true loves, marriage, babies, miscarriages, infertility, birth trauma, postpartum depression or anxiety, divorce… you name it, there is someone in this group who can relate. All of these different struggles have effected our relationships. We have had to learn to forgive one another and explain things to one another along the way.

I remember a time when many in the crew kind of got frustrated that they kept inviting one friend to everything, and she always seemed to have an excuse… so why should we keep inviting her? WELL… that friend happened to be struggling with infertility for many years, which made it difficult for her to emotionally handle 20 baby showers, followed by 20 first birthdays… all while pining for a child of her own. I know that was a tough time for her, but there’s nothing our village can’t handle. Once everyone knew her struggle and looked at it from that perspective… of course they all understood!… Which is why I always knew I would have their support regarding my own experience. However, even having all these amazing friends who I knew would understand and support me…. I also didn’t want to cry to someone who was pregnant and nervously awaiting their own C-section about how badly mine had gone. I didn’t want to scare anyone. Which was honestly kind of weird for me, because I don’t think there has ever been anything I didn’t feel comfortable talking to them about. So I still felt very alone initially.

However, once I realized I needed actual professional help… one of these ladies is where I turned, because I knew she knew someone who would know someone. lol And since I started sharing, I have gotten nothing but support, and even some stories. Believe it or not, if we weren’t close enough already, it only brought us closer. We have never really shied away from talking about our struggles with one another. I think because we have known each other so long, we are actually super blunt and honest with each other… or at least I know which ones to ask if I want an honest opinion lol. We share all the OMG motherhood moments, and laugh/cry together about how our tiny toddler terrorists are tearing our homes apart.

However, going through our motherhood journey simultaneously, can still make it hard to talk to even your closest friends… because you are still ultimately aware of how your struggles may make them feel… which is why I think therapy is SO important in healing from whatever motherhood struggles are thrown your way. While it is awesome to talk to other moms who can relate… in order to fully process my own trauma, I needed to talk to someone neutral, too. (In other words… in addition to a village, I recommend a good therapist, too. 😉 )

Once I started sharing… some of these women reached out like “OMG I’m so sorry I didn’t even know you were going through this, I feel like such a bad friend!”…. But they are NEVER bad friends. They are my village, and I know they support me and I support them. I know I can always turn to them when I need it. I know if my hands are full they will scoop up my child who is running into the street and discipline them like their own. I know I can hand them one child while I reach for the crying one on the floor. I can text them crazy diaper rash pictures of my naked children and say WTF do I do about this?! Or my carpet covered in peanut butter, WTF do I do about this?! lol

Find your village. Keep it real. Support each other. Be understanding. Avoid drama. Remember, it’s not a competition. Forgive. Talk about the hard things, too, when you’re ready… because even if you think you know everything about them… you’ll be surprised who can relate.

It takes a village. This is mine. I am SO proud of them all, and don’t know where my life would be without them!

These photos are from the most epic photo shoot, in honor of Mothers Day, long-lasting and growing friendships, and friends that are family. Thank you so much to the wonderful mama who thought of this idea, and Jennifer Lynn Photography for capturing this moment! ((She was SO amazing with that many little kids!!)) And I’ve only seen these few sneak peaks, but they are so amazing that we already plan to do it every year or two so that we can watch the progression! I asked my Dad to see if he can pull out some prom pictures of the same crew lol… stay tuned and cross your fingers for that! And if you have an amazing village, no matter how big or small.. I totally recommend doing a photo shoot to capture your friendship, because a village of strong mamas is such a beautiful thing.